Blog

Ask For Advice, Not Feedback

Written by Andy Walker | Sep 10, 2024 10:27:42 AM

Adam Grant, organisational psychologist and author, had problems getting feedback after his talks.

He found that when he asked he generally got two types of responses.

  1. Cheerleaders who said things like “You were excellent”, or

  2. Critics who would say things like “It wasn’t your best.”

Both the cheerleaders and the critics had one thing in common; their responses were short, vague and not actionable.

Critics, cheerleaders & coaches

Criticism and cheerleading both have underlying value.

Critics focus on highlighting weaknesses, risks and shortcomings.

Criticism can be harsh and hard to take, but it can help identify areas for improvement.

Cheerleaders focus on our strengths and celebrate our successes.

Cheerleading provides the positive reinforcement that boosts our confidence and motivation, but relying solely on cheerleaders creates skewed perceptions.

Grant wanted to get good quality feedback that would allow him to improve.

It was only when he started to ask, “What one thing should I do to improve?” that he started to get more constructive feedback.

The question forced people from providing simple default responses and encouraged them to provide considered feedback instead.

He had transformed his cheerleaders and critics into coaches.

Now he had a much clearer picture on how he was really doing, and he had practical guidance on how to improve.

Ask for advice, not feedback

So much of what is called feedback, like online reviews, is made up of superficial criticism and cheerleading.

It turns feedback into a top level statistic; a vanity metric.

It gives you a score, but it rarely tells you why you have that score and what you can do to improve it.

You have to uncover the ‘why’.

To make feedback useful you have to find a way to ask for advice.

Advice is more specific and actionable, making it easier to implement.

Advice enables improvement and growth.

Advice works. Adam Grant now gets paid five figures amounts per speaking engagement.

“It’s easy to be a critic or a cheerleader. It’s harder to be a coach.
A critic sees your weaknesses and attacks your worst self.
A cheerleader sees your strengths and celebrates your best self.
A coach sees your potential and helps you become a better version of yourself.”
- Adam Grant